It occurred to me the other day that I was laughing with a client because I completely and utterly understood where she was coming from. And then it hit me. No wonder I've been so busy helping my young adult clients overcome anxiety—wait for it—I “have it”, or should I say, “it has me” too! Of course, I have known this for many decades, but that day I had a kind of breakthrough. I can laugh at the insanity of it all. I've been there and done that on almost every occasion. My client Elsa said she was afraid of driving over bridges. Hmm, I don’t have that one. But I do have the one where my husband is driving too fast and I think I’m going to fall into the Hudson River. Then there’s the one where I’m going on a job interview and I think to myself, “OMG, I have gained so much weight since I had kids!” Or my mind goes blank and I forget everything I ever accomplished. Then there was the time my puppy ran across the highway and I had a panic attack. The worst is ruminating. Although I teach clients all day about fight or flight or freeze, I forget that I myself need to take a break from overthinking. When my kids started driving, I gained a new and paralyzing dread that someone would run into them. Add to that health and money worries, and sirens passing by while I’m quietly doing paperwork at home—catastrophizing is my specialty. Like what you are reading? For more stimulating stories, thought-provoking articles and new video announcements, sign up for our monthly newsletter. Self-care is our therapy buzz-word and it works wonders. My friend, a fellow therapist, said I need a spa day. “Do it!” My patient debated the whole day if she should take a “mental health day” from her demanding teaching schedule. “Do it!” Another patient wondered if she should take up journaling again. “Do it!” And the very process of pushing through your fears is instructive; it combats avoidance. My client was afraid to call her doctor for some results. “No problem, do it in my office.” My client was terrified to sleep over at his Dad’s new apartment. “Build up to it.” Once, many years ago, when my mother was dying of cancer, a kind and wonderful boss at Disney.com handed me a laptop and said, “I’ll see you when you’re ready.” Ask for help. Take a small step. All the clichés stacked up to the sky, or, as Annie Lamott says, “Bird by Bird.” The simple catchphrase, “Do it” flows so easily from my mouth—it just doesn’t quite make it to my ears and into my brain. Clients often ask me, “How I can begin to trust my inner voice when all I know is worry.” And I tell them “For one thing, you have a choice. It’s your life. Own it. Take care of it.” It seems to me that people in other countries get more time off to recharge. Only here do we grind ourselves until there’s no more fuel. And, let’s see if we are mislabeling anxiety as something else? If it’s not anxiety then what is it? 1. Anxiety from the past may be triggering a fear of abandonment. My client Mary wants to marry her boyfriend but thinks he might be cheating. She stalks him on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter on an hourly basis, based on her "hunch." She finds nothing but cannot stop her obsession. This is no longer a gut feeling, it's a bad habit, a self-destructive, relationship-bombing behavior that is sure to drive someone away. In this case, although there is no evidence whatsoever that he's a cheater, Mary continues to rely on her false "gut feeling" which only serves to create more anxiety and self-sabotage. Go back to where it’s coming from and try to counter the fear with a more realistic appraisal. 2. Anxiety masks as fear of the unknown. My client Joya wants to go out with a boy from her fraternity, but he is a “player.” When he finally asks her out, she says no based on what her friends have said. The information she has obtained is from the past, and unproven, especially since Joya really likes him. She continues to rely on second-hand information instead of living her own life. She is more afraid of the unknown than finding out the truth about him by using her own judgment. Unknown fears need to be faced, not avoided. Sometimes when I’m driving to a new place, I make it a habit to stop somewhere en route to pick up a treat or run an errand. This makes the unknown into a little adventure. 3. Anxiety is not the same as intuition. Jessica thinks her boyfriend is simultaneously dating someone else. Her so-called intuition is based on patterns and evidence that she has directly observed—he's always late, keeps his phone locked away and acts sneakily. Intuition tells her from observed experience that he is hiding something. Anxiety, fueled by insecurity misguides her into convincing herself that he is doing something wrong and that he will inevitably leave her, instead of leading her to confront him directly. As psychologist David Barlow warns us, “don’t believe everything you think.” “Ask him what's going on instead of making up stories in your head,” I suggest. Test the intuition with objective observation. Your anxiety may have something to tell you. If this sounds tricky, it is. Intuition can be considered a neutral and unemotional experience, whereas fear is highly emotionally charged. Reliable intuition feels right, it has a compassionate, affirming tone to it. It confirms that you are on target, without having an overly positive or negative feel to it. Fear is often anxious, dark or heavy. Take a step back and breathe deeply for a moment. What's the worst that can happen? What part is objective and what part has no business in the present? If it belongs in the past look at what happened. It's over. You are safe now. The only way to separate from rumination is to pause. My last client of the evening recounted her fight with her ex-girlfriend over text. “Please Hannah,” I said, “unplug for just five minutes. Then assess how you feel. You are only feeding the attention-seeking behavior of your ex. Can you step back? What will happen if you just sit quietly?” Can a therapist, this therapist, heal herself? The phone rings, the news blares, and real tragedy rings into our consciousness, implanting itself in vivid living color from a smart TV into our visual field whether we want it or not. I can help my clients not because I’m master of my anxiety and of my fate, but because I’m continuously right there with them. My friend calls and says “Let’s take a walk.” “Yes, I say. Let’s do it, everything else can wait.”   https://www.psychotherapy.net/blog/title/combatting-anxiety-bird-by-bird Originally published: GoodTherapy.org © 2020 Psychotherapy.net

Many therapists have "branded" their practices: Winding Road, Finding Yourself, Path to Fulfillment, Thoughtful Change, etc. etc. Nice, calm and creative names. They have a blog and a podcast. They pitch themselves on Youtube.  What does it all mean? To be honest, I'm not sure.  I just finished reading "Maybe You Should Talk to Someone" and it was good. Better than I expected in this hallowed Irvin Yalom corner of the world where therapy becomes the drama for a book, filled with colorful anectdotes and insights. Marketing works. That lady is probably really busy now! I am already really busy. I don't even want to be really busy! Balance is more what I'm after with myself and my patients. I have taken the week off to practice what I preach: get away, take time to breathe, visit the doctor, take a walk with a friend. These things are priceless right now. After counseling young adults about going back to college in a pandemic, I need to see some teens who are thriving. They are! They will! The world may yet be the same, but perhaps we can now hope for progressive change for all? With all the terrible of 2020, will there be a chance to reset, evolve, move forward? I sure hope so. Kamala Harris, no matter her potential flaws, is a ground breaking choice. Let's try to be better! My therapy practice consists of patience, reassurance and routine. I don't impose any critiques on my patients that I don't try on myself. I am not above it all; I am right there with you. Being the therapist means you also engage in self-care. It means that if the process itself is slow that's OK. It means if you have been traumatized in this life, there's time for you and I to heal. I have discovered for myself that "the body keeps the score." After a lifetime of therapy, adding Yoga to my own practice has illuminated the meaning of mind/body. You do your CBT, then you do your DBT. In other words, gain empathy, gain strength and insight and distress tolerance, then do body work to integrate everything, consolidate, put the energy where it belongs. Put your money where your mouth is. Learn to calm down. Perfectionism is our curse. In my Inhale Peace practice I am teaching young people to take more risks, to get out of their rooms, to do something creative, purposeful and consistent, NO MATTER WHAT IT IS. Have a reason to wake up each day and make MISTAKES. Making mistakes, as Aaron Beck has repeatedly pointed out, is the ONLY way we learn and gather experience. Avoidance only reinforces avoidance. How easy it is! But how constricting. Boredom, not depression is the scourge of young people. Don't mistake boredom for depression. Boredom can be remedied. In fact, why not do something new today? Go around the block if you haven't been out. Start small. Cook dinner for your family! Take a ride. One of my clients tried a new coffee place every day during quarantine. It's his only daily adventure! Get off your phones. Try online learning. Although I haven't been too happy doing Yoga online, get outside and take a stretch. Move around. Yes the body holds the stress, the mind perpetuates it. Take a break! Really. It can't hurt.

The Balancing Act of Parenthood When you're traveling, you get tired. I recently traveled to DC to see my wonderfully grown-up kid. She accomplished so much in her 20s—much more than I ever did. But I was exhausted, and out of my mouth came the following sentence: She: "Mom, you seem tired." Me: "I feel as if my entire life-force energy just drained out of me and into you!" It was hot. She did not appreciate this statement and said she wouldn't have kids based on that. OK, can you give a Mom a break?!! Moms get few breaks. That's why we often find ourselves frustrated with Dads. They simply cannot multitask in the ways that we can. Their brains are wired differently. (Men tend to disconnect from feelings - read more here ) Juggling Responsibilities I am trying to work, take care of myself, run a household, and support my grown kids—all while figuring out what happens next. And let's not forget, the world feels like it's on fire, but nobody seems to be able to stop it. The Wheel of Life In this wheel lies the secret to aging well! If only all of these aspects could be balanced, life would be grand. Often, the people I work with, including myself, have an imbalance in at least two areas. Emotional and psychological support can work wonders. Financial confusion has nearly ruined me, but I can seek help there too! Physical health is tricky because our bodies sometimes lose track of what’s going on (haha). I find social and spiritual aspects to be the icing on the cake. It's essential to carve out time to explore what's happening in your mind and body, gaining new insights about integration. The Importance of Hobbies In these challenging times, we need consistency and creativity! Having a hobby allows us to grow, stretch, and care for others. Simple activities like sitting, walking, breathing, or praying can set a positive intention. Explore spiritual practices here . Navigating Change and Embracing Authenticity In this life, you must make hard choices. Pain and regret are inevitable. What makes you think you won't experience them? Change is an internal process. I had to overcome a lot, and while I don’t dwell on it, I do feel overwhelmed at times. Don’t sit around marinating in disappointment and grief forever. Taking Risks for Authenticity Take a risk to be the authentic you. Be kind to yourself. Stop worrying about what others think. Their opinions of you are none of your business! We only have this one sacred life. Finding Peace Amidst Chaos Life can be chaotic, but it's crucial to find moments of peace. Whether through meditation, nature walks, or simply enjoying a cup of tea, these moments can help ground us. Building a Support Network Surround yourself with supportive people. Friends, family, or even online communities can provide the encouragement we need. Sharing our experiences can lighten the load and foster connection. The Journey of Self-Discovery Self-discovery is a lifelong journey. Embrace it! Learn about your strengths and weaknesses. Understand what brings you joy and what drains your energy. This awareness can guide your choices and help you lead a more fulfilling life. Conclusion: Embrace Your Journey Remember, life is not about perfection. It's about progress. Embrace your journey, with all its ups and downs. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small, and be gentle with yourself during tough times. We only have this one sacred life. Let's make it count!

My daughter recently traveled to Hawaii after completing the grueling two-day BAR exam. This exam is not about drinking at a bar; it’s the one that qualifies individuals to practice law in our country, ensuring that all people are safe, secure, and entitled to due process. What an achievement! The Emotional Rollercoaster When she expressed feelings of worry, insecurity, and overwhelm, I reassured her that these emotions were completely normal. It’s common to feel jealous of friends who seem to navigate life effortlessly. I reminded her that it’s okay to care deeply about others, like her anorexic friend, while still feeling overwhelmed. Life is full of tremendous changes, and we all face difficulty in the face of this change. Let's have therapists normalize this as growth, development, learning, and character, not weakness, paralysis and pathology! I recall a time when my sister asked, "How did I get here?" Life takes us on unexpected journeys, teaching us valuable lessons along the way. As Pema Chodron wisely said, " Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know ." Life can be a good teacher, presenting difficulties as opportunities rather than problems to avoid. When my 26 yo client said, I don't know who I am, I said, as my therapist once told me, "What makes you think anyone knows these things?!" All a process. This article from NY Times explains it well: “Ask a dozen therapists what they do that best promotes change in their clients, and you’ll hear just as many answers.” The Power of Normalizing in Therapy A skilled therapist will tell you that normalizing is about letting people know they are not alone in their struggles and they don't have to identify with their struggles. While at the same time not minimizing those same issues. This is especially beneficial in group therapy settings. In a suicide bereavement group I facilitate for a small non-profit, I’ve witnessed members normalize grief for newcomers. They especially do this through sharing, joking, and even laughing in the face of immense tragedy. It bonds them to each other instead of the pain. In therapy, normalizing refers to helping clients understand that their thoughts, feelings, and experiences are typical given their circumstances. It reassures them that they are not alone in their challenges. Benefits of Normalizing in Therapy Normalizing offers several key benefits to clients: Reduces Shame and Isolation: Many individuals feel alone or ashamed of their struggles. Normalizing reassures them that their feelings are not unusual, fostering a sense of belonging and acceptance. Promotes Open Communication: When clients feel less stigmatized, they are more likely to speak openly about their concerns, leading to a more productive therapeutic process. Enhances Self-Esteem and Fosters Self-Compassion: Normalizing helps clients realize that their struggles do not define their worth. It encourages them to be kind to themselves during tough times. Perseverance Through Challenges When I’ve faced challenges that seemed insurmountable—whether in parenting, finances, or creative pursuits—my support system often reminded me, "This too shall pass." Perseverance is key. Some individuals have persevered for generations. My family, for instance, fled Russia during the pogroms of World War I. That must have been terrifying! My grandmother was one of four sisters born after their mother arrived at Ellis Island. Tragically, a fifth sister died shortly after birth from scarlet fever. What Not to Normalize While normalizing experiences can be beneficial, there are certain aspects of life that should not be normalized. Recognizing these can help us maintain a healthy perspective and encourage positive change. Abuse: Any form of abuse—whether physical, emotional, or psychological—should never be normalized. It's crucial to seek help and support in these situations. Mental Health Issues: Struggling with mental health should not be seen as a normal part of life. It's important to address these issues with professional help. Unhealthy Relationships: Accepting toxic or unhealthy relationships as normal can lead to further emotional harm. Healthy boundaries and mutual respect should be prioritized. Discrimination: Normalizing discrimination or prejudice in any form is harmful. It’s essential to challenge and combat these attitudes. Chronic Stress: Living in a constant state of stress should not be accepted as normal. Finding ways to manage stress and prioritize self-care is vital. By recognizing what should not be normalized, we can foster a healthier mindset and encourage others to seek the support they need.

Continuing to grow as a therapist means more than just gaining experience with clients. It involves staying current with new techniques, ethical standards, and research in the mental health field. One of the best ways to do this is by earning therapist CE credits . These credits not only fulfill licensing requirements but also enhance your skills and confidence in practice. Let’s explore how you can maximize your career by strategically using CE credits. Why Therapist CE Credits Matter for Your Career Therapist CE credits are essential for maintaining your license and staying updated with the latest developments in therapy. But beyond compliance, they offer many benefits: Skill Enhancement : Learning new therapeutic approaches or deepening your knowledge in specialized areas. Professional Credibility : Demonstrating commitment to your profession and ethical standards. Networking Opportunities : Connecting with peers and experts through workshops and courses. Career Advancement : Opening doors to new job roles or private practice specialties. For example, if you want to specialize in trauma therapy, taking CE courses focused on trauma-informed care can give you the tools and credentials to attract clients needing that expertise. Therapist desk with learning materials Therapist’s workspace ready for continuing education How to Choose the Right Therapist CE Credits Not all CE courses are created equal. Choosing the right ones can make a big difference in your professional growth. Here are some tips: Check Licensing Board Requirements Each state or region may have specific CE requirements. Make sure the courses you select are approved by your licensing board. Focus on Your Career Goals Identify areas where you want to improve or specialize. For example, if you want to work with children, look for courses on child psychology or play therapy. Consider Course Format Some therapists prefer in-person workshops for hands-on learning, while others benefit from online courses that fit their schedule. Look for Quality Providers Choose reputable organizations or instructors with strong credentials and positive reviews. Balance Theory and Practice Select courses that offer practical skills you can apply immediately, not just theoretical knowledge. For instance, continuing education credits offered by Donna C. Moss provide a variety of topics and formats that cater to busy therapists looking to expand their expertise. How many hours is 1 CE worth? Understanding how CE hours translate into credits is important for planning your education. Typically, 1 CE credit equals 1 hour of instruction . This means if a course is 3 hours long, you earn 3 CE credits. However, some courses may include additional activities like quizzes or assignments that count toward credit hours. Always verify with the course provider how credits are calculated. For example, a 6-hour workshop on cognitive behavioral therapy techniques will give you 6 CE credits, which you can apply toward your license renewal. Practical Tips to Maximize Your CE Experience Earning CE credits is more than just ticking a box. Here are ways to get the most out of your learning: Set Clear Learning Objectives Before starting a course, decide what skills or knowledge you want to gain. Take Notes and Reflect Write down key points and think about how you can apply them in your practice. Engage with Instructors and Peers Ask questions and participate in discussions to deepen your understanding. Apply New Techniques Quickly Try out new methods with clients soon after learning to reinforce your skills. Keep a CE Log Track your completed courses, credits earned, and renewal deadlines to stay organized. By following these steps, you turn CE credits into real career growth rather than just a requirement. Therapist taking notes during continuing education Therapist actively taking notes during a continuing education course Beyond Credits: Building a Lifelong Learning Mindset While CE credits are necessary, the ultimate goal is to cultivate a mindset of lifelong learning. This approach keeps you curious, adaptable, and passionate about your work. Stay Curious Explore new topics even outside your immediate specialty. Seek Feedback Regularly ask clients or supervisors for input to identify areas for improvement. Join Professional Groups Engage with communities that share knowledge and support. Attend Conferences and Seminars These events offer fresh perspectives and networking opportunities. Read Widely Books, journals, and blogs can supplement formal education. By embracing continuous growth, you not only maintain your license but also become a more effective and fulfilled therapist. Maximizing your therapist career with therapist CE credits is a journey of ongoing development. By choosing the right courses, understanding credit requirements, and applying what you learn, you can enhance your skills and open new doors in your professional life. Remember, education is not just a requirement - it’s a powerful tool to deepen your impact and satisfaction in your meaningful work.

Continuing education is a vital part of a therapist’s professional journey. It helps maintain licensure, sharpens skills, and keeps therapists updated on the latest research and techniques. But navigating the world of CE credits can sometimes feel overwhelming. This guide will walk you through everything you need to know about earning CE credits for therapists in a thoughtful, caring, and relaxed way. Why CE Credits for Therapists Matter Therapists are lifelong learners. The field of mental health is always evolving, with new therapies, research findings, and ethical standards emerging regularly. CE credits ensure that therapists stay current and competent. They also demonstrate a commitment to professional growth and client care. For example, a therapist specializing in cognitive-behavioral therapy might take a course on trauma-informed care to better serve clients with PTSD. This not only broadens their skill set but also enhances client outcomes. Many states require therapists to complete a certain number of CE credits to renew their licenses. Failing to meet these requirements can result in penalties or even loss of licensure. Therefore, understanding how to earn and track CE credits is essential. How to Find the Right CE Credits for Therapists Finding the right CE credits can feel like searching for a needle in a haystack. Here are some practical tips to help you choose courses that are both relevant and enjoyable: Check State Requirements: Each state has its own rules about the number and type of CE credits required. Start by reviewing your state licensing board’s website. Look for Accredited Providers: Ensure the courses are approved by recognized organizations such as the American Psychological Association (APA) or the National Board for Certified Counselors (NBCC). Match Your Interests and Needs: Choose courses that align with your specialty or areas where you want to grow. For example, if you want to improve your skills in family therapy, look for courses focused on that. Consider Format and Flexibility: Online courses offer convenience, while in-person workshops provide hands-on experience. Some therapists prefer a mix of both. Read Reviews and Ask Colleagues: Feedback from peers can help you find high-quality courses. By following these steps, you can make your continuing education both effective and enjoyable. What are continuing education credits? Continuing education credits are units that therapists earn by completing approved educational activities. These credits count toward the requirements needed to maintain professional licensure. Typically, one credit equals one hour of instruction. CE credits cover a wide range of topics, including ethics, clinical skills, cultural competence, and new treatment modalities. They can be earned through various formats such as: Workshops and seminars Online courses and webinars Conferences and symposiums Self-study programs For example, a therapist might attend a weekend workshop on mindfulness techniques and earn 12 CE credits. Alternatively, they could complete an online course on ethical decision-making at their own pace. Tracking your CE credits is crucial. Many licensing boards require documentation, so keep certificates and transcripts organized. Some states also have specific deadlines for submitting proof of completed credits. If you want to explore options, consider this continuing education credits resource for therapists. Tips for Maximizing Your CE Credit Experience Earning CE credits doesn’t have to be a chore. Here are some tips to make the process more rewarding: Plan Ahead: Don’t wait until the last minute to complete your credits. Spread them out over the license renewal period. Set Learning Goals: Identify what you want to achieve with each course. This keeps your learning focused and meaningful. Engage Actively: Take notes, participate in discussions, and apply new knowledge to your practice. Balance Theory and Practice: Choose courses that offer both conceptual understanding and practical tools. Network: Use workshops and conferences to connect with other professionals. Sharing experiences can deepen your learning. Reflect: After completing a course, reflect on how it impacts your work and client relationships. By approaching CE credits with intention and curiosity, you transform them from a requirement into an opportunity for growth. Staying Zen While Managing CE Credits Balancing work, life, and continuing education can be stressful. Here are some strategies to keep a calm and positive mindset: Create a Schedule: Dedicate specific times for CE activities to avoid last-minute stress. Choose Enjoyable Topics: Learning is easier when you’re interested in the subject. Practice Self-Care: Take breaks, meditate, or do something fun after completing courses. Use Technology: Apps and online platforms can help you track credits and deadlines. Seek Support: Join study groups or professional organizations for encouragement. Remember, earning CE credits is part of your professional journey, not just a box to check. Embrace it as a chance to deepen your expertise and enhance your impact. Continuing education is more than a requirement - it’s a pathway to becoming the best therapist you can be. By understanding the importance of CE credits for therapists, finding the right courses, and managing your learning with care, you set yourself up for success and fulfillment in your career. Keep learning, stay curious, and enjoy the journey.

A 27-year-old female came to my office in 2025 wearing a mask. I thought, "COVID is kind of over, so why would a beautiful young adult be afraid now?" During the in-person intake session, she explained that she had been hiding her whole life. She appeared shut down and said she couldn't talk about most things—she would be too worried about me! I then shared how therapy works. Hesitant, she said she needed time. As an experienced clinician, I understood what this meant: her trauma story. The Importance of Co-Regulation in Therapy Part of me wanted to know more. I wanted to keep the day moving and see what I was dealing with—the girl behind the mask. But that was me being selfish. I told myself to slow down and match her energy. It might be cool to hear this on TikTok, but it's a real-life skill that can be quite helpful. It starts with the parent-child attachment and is called "co-regulation." Co-regulation in a clinical setting refers to the process by which healthcare providers and patients work together to manage emotional and physiological states. This collaborative approach emphasizes the importance of interpersonal relationships in fostering a supportive environment, which can enhance patient outcomes (See: relational approach/integrative approach). By actively engaging in co-regulation, clinicians can help patients feel more secure and understood. This ultimately leads to improved compliance with treatment and better overall health. I also recognize that I am a good co-regulator because I do it too much. As a lifelong people-pleaser, it comes easily. You match the mood, and you stay out of trouble. Any trauma survivor knows this—just ask an adult child of an alcoholic parent. They know their way around. But to skillfully do it in a session takes a lot of patience. I think of my mother and how she helped children learn to read. What amount of patience did that take? I could never have done that. I slowed down my pacing, which is also a technique in therapy, assuming the dog doesn't completely wreck it. Most good books on trauma will tell you: take your time. Repeating the story isn't a must, but generally, it helps. Should You Tell the Trauma Story or Does That Re-Traumatize in Therapy? When navigating the complexities of trauma in therapy, the decision to share your trauma story can be daunting. On one hand, recounting your experiences can be a vital part of the healing process. It allows you to process emotions, gain insight, and integrate the trauma into your life narrative. This storytelling can foster a sense of empowerment and agency, shifting the focus from being a victim to becoming an active participant in your recovery. However, there is a valid concern that revisiting traumatic events may lead to re-traumatization. The act of recounting the trauma can exacerbate feelings of distress and anxiety. It is crucial for therapists to create a safe and supportive environment. Utilizing techniques such as grounding exercises and gradual exposure can help clients navigate their stories at a pace that feels manageable. Ultimately, the choice to tell the trauma story should be guided by individual readiness and the therapeutic relationship. This ensures that the process promotes healing rather than harm. The Role of Yoga, Mindfulness, and Distress Tolerance in Healing Yoga, mindfulness, and distress tolerance play vital roles in the healing process. Here are some key reasons why they are essential: Promotes Relaxation: Both yoga and mindfulness techniques help reduce stress and promote relaxation. Improves Focus: Mindfulness enhances concentration and helps individuals stay present, which can aid in the healing journey. Enhances Emotional Regulation: Distress tolerance skills equip individuals with tools to manage difficult emotions effectively. Physical Benefits: Yoga improves physical health, flexibility, and strength, contributing to overall well-being. Mind-Body Connection: These practices foster a deeper connection between the mind and body, facilitating holistic healing. The Therapeutic Process: Being Present As we approach the end of the session, I focus on the process in the here-and-now. "How are you doing? How was it to be here?" Then I gather the courage to say some words. I don't honestly know how long I've been doing this work, but it felt so right. Thank God it landed: "I have a feeling that some really bad things happened to you," I say quietly. She nods, still much frozen. She knows that the body keeps the score. I hope she comes back. Conclusion: The Journey Ahead Healing from trauma is a journey that requires patience, understanding, and support. It is essential to create a safe space where individuals can explore their feelings and experiences. Whether through storytelling, co-regulation, or practices like yoga and mindfulness, the path to recovery can be transformative. Each step taken is a step toward a healthier, more peaceful life. In this journey, remember that you are not alone. There are resources and support available to help you navigate the complexities of trauma. Embrace the process, and allow yourself the grace to heal. --- For more insights on mental health and therapeutic practices, visit Donna C Moss .

Poppy In my work with clients, I've often encountered a deep sense of cynicism. Why wouldn't they feel this way? They were born into a world forever changed by events like 9/11. My daughter, born in 2001, missed much of her college experience due to COVID-19. Now, she faces a daunting job market and overwhelming debt in a world that feels increasingly flat and uncertain. Understanding Their World How can I help them make sense of it all? I often find myself wishing I could tell my daughter how sorry I am. Sorry that she doesn't know the pure joy of riding her bike after school without a phone in her pocket. Sorry that there seems to be no supportive community for young people to come together, sing, and dance. Sorry that for much of her life, a chaotic political landscape has loomed over her, with rising student debt and soaring medical costs stealing from her future. Imagine living in a world where you hesitate to call an ambulance, fearing it might lead to bankruptcy. This is the reality many young adults face today. Relationships in a Changing Landscape When it comes to relationships, the situation appears grim. The divorce rate remains steady at over 50%. How can young adults beat those odds while juggling two jobs? I've seen my friends' kids struggle. Those who aimed high often find their souls drained by corporate demands, while those who took a slower path encounter fewer opportunities. Living in a city like New York is increasingly unaffordable. The dating apps are disheartening. It's tough to find someone who shows up with maturity and good manners. The city can be isolating, and many young men seem to lack the reliability that is so crucial in relationships. Can we learn to set a time and a place for a date? Can we avoid ghosting one another? For young women, it's essential not to lower your standards but to adjust them. Embrace mental flexibility when facing challenges. The Importance of Compromise I have a client who has a long list of conditions for meeting a partner. The issue? Those conditions are too rigid. Compatibility is vital, but so is chemistry, stability, and shared values. These ingredients mix to create a fulfilling relationship. However, compromise is not your enemy. These times call for awareness and understanding. We need to find a path where we can believe in ourselves and our connections. People should come together, even in the cold, for freedom, hope, and community. It's not just about greed; it's about breaking bread and traveling together. A Call for Change I don’t want to sit around and sing Kumbaya—though it wouldn’t hurt. I recognize that the world is shifting beneath our feet. Did I ever imagine, at their age, wandering alone in Tel Aviv, that we would live in a time where expressing our identity could feel dangerous? I do not support any country's overreach or lack of humanity. Yes, any nation has the right to defend itself. But if we love our children more than our weapons, we must pause and listen. We need to inject spontaneity and unstructured fun into our kids' lives. Going back to basics is better than turning inward and darker. The Anxious Generation Jon Haidt got it right—this is not just an Anxious Generation ; it is a bewildered, confused, and angry one. We must strive to make America joyful again. #MAJA. In these challenging times, we can foster healthier, more peaceful lives for ourselves and those we support. By embracing flexibility, community, and understanding, we can navigate the complexities of modern life together.

Mental health for young adults is a topic close to my heart. Navigating the transition from adolescence to adulthood can be both exciting and challenging. During this time, young adults face new responsibilities, social pressures, and emotional changes that can impact their mental well-being. As someone who cares deeply about fostering healthier, more peaceful lives, I want to share practical insights and compassionate advice to support young adults on their mental health journey. Understanding Mental Health for Young Adults Mental health for young adults is a complex and multifaceted issue. It involves emotional, psychological, and social well-being, influencing how individuals think, feel, and behave. Young adults often experience stress from school, work, relationships, and identity exploration. These pressures can sometimes lead to anxiety, depression, or other mental health challenges. Recognizing the signs early is crucial. Some common indicators include: Persistent sadness or irritability Withdrawal from friends and family Changes in sleep or eating habits Difficulty concentrating or making decisions Feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness Supporting young adults means creating a safe space where they feel heard and understood. Encouraging open conversations about mental health can reduce stigma and empower them to seek help when needed. Magnolia Season, DC Practical Ways to Support Young Adults’ Mental Health Supporting mental health for young adults requires a thoughtful and proactive approach. Here are some practical strategies that can make a real difference: Encourage Healthy Routines Establishing regular sleep, exercise, and nutrition habits can stabilize mood and energy levels. Suggest simple activities like morning walks or cooking balanced meals together. Promote Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, or yoga can help manage stress. Even a few minutes a day can bring a sense of calm and clarity. Foster Social Connections Encourage participation in clubs, groups, or volunteer work. Positive social interactions build resilience and reduce feelings of isolation. Provide Access to Professional Help Sometimes, professional support is necessary. Therapy, counseling, or support groups offer specialized guidance tailored to individual needs. Educate About Mental Health Sharing reliable information helps young adults understand their experiences and reduces fear or confusion. Be Patient and Non-Judgmental Recovery and growth take time. Listening without judgment and offering consistent support can strengthen trust and encourage openness. By integrating these approaches, families and professionals can create a nurturing environment that promotes mental wellness. What is the 3 Month Rule in Mental Health? The "3 month rule" in mental health is a guideline often used to assess the persistence and severity of symptoms before making a formal diagnosis or treatment plan. It suggests that if symptoms of anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues last for three months or more, it may be time to seek professional evaluation. This rule helps differentiate between temporary stress reactions and more chronic conditions. For young adults, this is particularly important because early intervention can prevent symptoms from worsening. Understanding this rule encourages patience and observation. It also highlights the importance of monitoring mental health over time rather than reacting to every fleeting emotion. If you notice that a young adult’s struggles persist beyond this period, consider reaching out to a mental health professional for guidance. How Families and Professionals Can Collaborate Supporting young adults with mental health challenges is most effective when families and professionals work together. Here’s how this collaboration can be strengthened: Open Communication: Families should feel comfortable sharing observations and concerns with therapists or counselors. Professionals can provide feedback and strategies tailored to the young adult’s needs. Consistent Support: Both parties should encourage adherence to treatment plans, including therapy sessions, medication (if prescribed), and lifestyle changes. Education and Training: Parents and caregivers can benefit from specialized training to understand mental health conditions better and learn how to respond effectively. Empowerment: Professionals can help young adults develop coping skills and self-advocacy, while families provide emotional support and encouragement. Crisis Planning: Establish clear plans for managing emergencies, including recognizing warning signs and knowing when to seek immediate help. This partnership creates a safety net that promotes recovery and resilience. Embracing a Holistic Approach to Mental Wellness Mental health for young adults is not just about managing symptoms; it’s about fostering overall well-being. A holistic approach considers physical health, emotional balance, social connections, and personal growth. Some ways to embrace this approach include: Encouraging Creative Expression: Art, music, writing, or dance can be therapeutic outlets for emotions. Promoting Physical Activity: Regular exercise boosts mood and reduces anxiety. Supporting Academic and Career Goals: Helping young adults set realistic goals and manage stress related to school or work. Building Life Skills: Teaching time management, problem-solving, and communication skills enhances confidence and independence. Nurturing Spirituality or Mindfulness: Practices that connect individuals to a sense of purpose or inner peace can be grounding. By addressing the whole person, we create a foundation for lasting mental health. If you want to take immediate steps to support a young adult in your life, consider this resource: Help Your Young Adult with Mental Health Now . Moving Forward with Compassion and Hope Supporting mental health for young adults is a journey filled with challenges and triumphs. It requires patience, understanding, and a willingness to learn and adapt. By fostering open dialogue, encouraging healthy habits, and collaborating with professionals, we can help young adults navigate this critical phase with resilience and hope. Remember, every small step counts. Whether it’s a kind word, a listening ear, or seeking professional help, your support can make a profound difference in a young adult’s life. Together, we can create a world where mental health is valued, and young adults thrive with confidence and peace.

Navigating your 20s can feel like walking a tightrope between exciting opportunities and overwhelming challenges. Whether it’s managing stress from work, relationships, or personal growth, having the right support can make all the difference. Online therapy has become a powerful tool for many young adults seeking guidance and healing in a flexible, accessible way. But how do you find the best fit for your unique needs? Let’s explore how to find the best online therapist for your 20s and make the most of this journey. Why Online Therapy for 20s is a Game-Changer The 20s are a time of transition - moving out, starting careers, building relationships, and figuring out who you really are. Traditional therapy can sometimes feel intimidating or inconvenient, especially with busy schedules and social anxieties. Online therapy offers a relaxed, accessible alternative that fits into your life seamlessly. Flexibility: Schedule sessions around your classes, work, or social life. Comfort: Talk from your favorite cozy spot, whether it’s your bedroom or a quiet café. Variety: Access therapists from different backgrounds and specialties, no matter where you live. Affordability: Many platforms offer sliding scale fees or subscription models that can be easier on your budget. For example, if you’re a college student juggling exams and part-time jobs, online therapy can provide consistent support without the stress of commuting or rigid appointment times. It’s a way to prioritize your mental health while maintaining your lifestyle. How to Choose the Right Online Therapist for Your 20s Finding the right therapist is like finding a good friend - it takes time, trust, and a bit of trial and error. Here are some practical steps to help you choose wisely: Identify Your Needs: Are you dealing with anxiety, depression, relationship issues, or career stress? Some therapists specialize in certain areas, so knowing your focus helps narrow down options. Check Credentials: Look for licensed professionals with experience in young adult mental health. Consider Therapy Style: Some therapists use cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), others prefer mindfulness or talk therapy. Research what resonates with you. Read Reviews and Bios: Many platforms provide client reviews and therapist bios. Look for someone whose approach and personality feel like a good match. Schedule a Consultation: Many therapists offer a free or low-cost initial session. Use this to see if you feel comfortable and understood. Remember, it’s okay to switch therapists if the first one doesn’t feel right. Your comfort and trust are key to making progress. What is a Red Flag in Therapy? While therapy is meant to be a safe space, not every therapist will be the right fit. Recognizing red flags early can save you time and emotional energy. Here are some warning signs to watch for: Lack of Empathy: If your therapist seems dismissive or uninterested in your feelings, that’s a problem. Pushing Boundaries: Therapy should respect your pace. If you feel pressured to share more than you’re ready for, speak up or reconsider. Unprofessional Behavior: This includes being late consistently, canceling frequently, or inappropriate comments. Ignoring Your Goals: Therapy should be collaborative. If your therapist ignores what you want to work on, it’s a sign to reassess. Overpromising Results: Healing is a process. Be cautious of therapists who guarantee quick fixes or unrealistic outcomes. Trust your instincts. If something feels off, it’s okay to seek a second opinion or change therapists. Therapy session notes highlighting important reflections Making the Most of Your Online Therapy Experience Once you find your therapist, maximizing the benefits of online therapy involves some mindful practices: Create a Private Space: Find a quiet, comfortable spot where you won’t be interrupted. Set a Routine: Treat therapy sessions like important appointments. Consistency helps build momentum. Be Open and Honest: The more you share, the better your therapist can support you. Use Tools and Homework: Many therapists provide exercises or journaling prompts. Engage with these between sessions. Practice Patience: Change takes time. Celebrate small victories and be gentle with setbacks. For example, if anxiety is your focus, your therapist might guide you through breathing exercises or cognitive reframing techniques to practice daily. These small steps add up to meaningful progress. Supporting Your Mental Health Beyond Therapy Therapy is a powerful tool, but it’s just one part of a holistic approach to mental wellness. Here are some additional ways to support your mental health in your 20s: Stay Active: Regular exercise boosts mood and reduces stress. Connect with Others: Build a support network of friends, family, or support groups. Practice Mindfulness: Meditation, yoga, or simple breathing exercises can ground you. Maintain Healthy Habits: Sleep, nutrition, and hydration all impact mental health. Set Boundaries: Learn to say no and protect your energy. Combining these habits with therapy creates a balanced, sustainable path to well-being. Finding the best online therapist for 20s is a personal journey, but one worth taking. With the right support, your 20s can be a time of growth, healing, and self-discovery. Remember, you deserve care that meets you where you are and helps you thrive. If you’re ready to start, take a deep breath, trust yourself, and take that first step toward a healthier, more peaceful life.

xmas day 2025 A Slow Descent from Scarsdale We started moving down from Scarsdale slowly at first. It felt like a sedate drip of loss. Where do you go if you start off high? I don’t just mean in status. I mean in experience and process. Ultimately, you might end up feeling like an ascetic. I’ve been told I have too much clutter, so I guess that’s why. I like to hold onto things. It could have been a divorce like any other. Reflections on My Childhood Wait, I should start earlier if this is a memoir. My parents’ marriage was… well, let’s just say we were somehow upper middle class—thanks to my brilliant grandfather, a genius of sorts, who supposedly went months without talking to my grandmother. I had a loving family, a dog named Hector Protector (apparently, we needed protection), and a big house filled with friends. We visited our maternal grandparents every weekend and Dad’s parents often too. I remember the wallpaper in our big Scarsdale house. My mother said decorating was not her strongest suit. But green and orange? Whatever. The only time I saw her cry was when the dog ate the expensive curtains. We had a fireplace, and I’ve never had one since. I know how it sounds. Spoiled girl! The Impact of My Father's Personality But the hits kept coming. My dad was a mix of Jeffrey Epstein and Donald Trump, sprinkled with some borscht-belt humor. His narcissistic wounds came from his mother, who scolded him, “Where are the other two points?” or praised him with, "Look at my boy, how handsome!" And he was. Quick and clever, just like his parents—a very bright couple. Dad was boxed out of that marriage in a way. His mother was intense, a full-time working English teacher, as many women in my family were. She would read us short stories, some quite disturbing, like "The Most Dangerous Game." Of four brothers who lived well into their 90s, my paternal Grandpa dropped dead at 62 on New Year’s Eve, right as he was about to enjoy his well-earned retirement. All the luck. This backdrop was filled with great hope and promise in this country: Vietnam but post-war optimism, JFK, the moon landing. We could do anything. My father was going to catapult from books to movies. Then he left. A Turbulent Family Dynamic On Yom Kippur, when I was nine, my father shoved my aunt. I was scared. Apparently, fasting isn’t the best for every family. My mother sued my father for child support. That year, when I visited him in California, he struck the process server with a lug wrench from the car seat. Somehow, his arm was gushing blood, and having just received my driver’s license, I found myself driving to Cedars Sinai emergency down one of the boulevards near LA. This may have been the beginning of my people-pleasing tendencies to avoid my father’s rage—his narcissistic rage. He believed he was special and deserved special treatment, explosive when he didn’t get it. My mother chalked it up to bipolar disorder. It took me a long time to appreciate the highs and lows of childhood—who knew? Once she stated, “The year he was on lithium was the best year of our marriage.” As the "golden child" of my father’s doting attention, I basked in the light of tennis (or anything with a racket), thrilled to be his narcissistic supply. I behaved well and excelled. I had some minor weaknesses—a tendency toward disorganization, shall we say? I would lose things. I still remember him whipping his head around after slamming on the brakes. We would go back for it. What is it called when you try to counteract the pain of abandonment? You over-try, over-compensate. You fawn and navigate social situations like a helpless child, tuned up by hyper-vigilance of your environment. I could get on so well in social situations that I became a therapist—my very own superpower! The Reality of Abandonment Oh wait. I forgot the middle. Is this a memoir? My father had a lot of ideas. He was tall, handsome, and grandiose. But when he left us—and boy, do I mean left us—he left me with the mistaken belief that he would still magically be there for all the experiences a young girl might need. Full stop. Reality is what’s happening. A weak grasp on reality is telling your kids you would ALWAYS be there for them and then moving 3,000 miles away. OK, it happens. But the narcissism. Yes, oh yes, the narcissism. "I'm going to hit the Next.Big.Thing!" he would exclaim. Ever met an old man narcissist? Not pretty. Finding Stability in Uncertainty Don’t worry; I did OK. I married someone more eccentric and less social than my father, but definitely more loyal. He taught me much about loyalty and many other things. Oh, and my mother died. That was like sooooooo bad. Do you see? I’m just a regular girl trying to survive in this cruel world. My husband became disabled. That doesn’t define me. I mean, the resentment is as hot as a poker on Christmas, which it happens to be today. Years of nothingness without a mother, father, or husband. My kids fulfilled me and exhausted me, but that blur of time was everything. I worked so hard to shield them from our harsh political failure while my husband railed against the rise of authoritarianism in the US, long before Trump. We had friends, we lost friends. We had family, we lost family. His family treated me with utter disdain because they didn’t like him. I didn’t deserve that. The Loss of a Mentor I had a therapist who died of an apparent overdose. Yep. I met him at Kripalu—totally random. He was only the third therapist I’d ever had in my life. He was larger than life. A Buddhist with a vast trauma history and a flair for storytelling, this guy was the real deal. You wanted to be him. I was utterly drawn to him in some strange, mystical way. I think I’m intuitive. I feel and sense things seconds before they happen. Sometimes, I still cling to the feeling that a natural disaster will literally sweep Trump away. Embracing the Holiday Spirit I’ve been thinking a lot about Christmas. I copped out by being Jewish all these years. I didn’t really care much about Christian holidays. But this year, I decided to lean into it a little. What is really going on here? You work all year for this one frenzied day? Help me understand! The build-up and letdown have GOT to be disappointing. Build-up to what exactly? My client stated that the postman, whom she doesn’t like, slipped something under her apartment door! Up until this moment, I still don’t think I understand. Is that terrifying? A girl alone in New York City—what is she to do? Thirty years ago, I still remember bumping into my old high school friend Aaron Sorkin on the uptown 4-5-6 subway. I wasn't afraid then. (He even named a character for me!!). A Life Full of Challenges I’ve had a good life. My friend says, “You’re so lucky; you haven’t had any bad stuff.” What? (As my daughter constantly says to me when I sound incoherent after a long day). Friend, I say, I've had plenty. We all have. You pick like a scab. Obsessive but not compulsive, we joke. My friends and I like to laugh. Some of my friends get into fights at pickleball. I don’t. (Of course). The Complexity of Relationships My husband is annoying, and people don’t like him. It’s OK because he’s smart (book-smart, like reads the Constitution in the bathroom smart, can take any test smart) and tall (like can’t sit on an airplane tall). People find him intimidating. Oh, and he is intimidating. He wears black and knows a lot about a lot of things. I know a little bit about a small group of things. I don’t know how this marriage has lasted. I’m just starting to realize that I actually do need him to look after me—not just the other way around. I do things backward a lot of times. I fall. Yes, even though I am athletic with a racket, I can’t dance, and I am clumsy. I fall into myself. Finding Gratitude Amidst Chaos I shouldn’t be so focused on self-pity. My kids turned out amazing! I guess I need to be more like George Bailey in “It’s a Wonderful Life,” which the same husband forced us all to watch on Christmas Eve. I need to appreciate what I have. The dark night of my mother’s solstice birthday. The grim realities of my job getting overtaken by AI. The prospect of my husband’s back ever getting stronger. The panic as I see my kids launch into a society possessed, I tell you, by greed. As if nothing else mattered. My small, messy house is under-par. But the family is whole. Wholly messed up. Holly Holy Love (thank you Neil Diamond). On this journey, we learn to navigate the complexities of life, relationships, and our own mental health. It's a path filled with suffering, but also, moments of joy and connection. Embracing these experiences can lead to a deeper understanding of ourselves and those around us.

local track - hastings-on-hudson, ny When the darkness starts coming around mid-November and the clocks turn back, many people call me - in fact - the most people call me of all the times of the year! (However, I have read it can happen in ANY season!!). As the Solstice approaches we all have to turn inward a while. It's not a punishment, as my dear Dad would say. I happen to be one of those rare individuals who is BOTH an introvert and an extrovert. I love to be around people (the right people at the right time, and not too many!); but I also appreciate taking a walk by myself, hearing the sounds of nature, and reading something compelling. I love books, pickleball and photography. I hate cooking, treadmills and crowds. It's all good. Here are some tips from Dialectical Behavioral Therapy which could help you, your clients and your family!! Mindfulness: Take a few moments each day to pause, breathe, and check in with yourself. Notice your emotions without judgment, just name them and allow them to be present. Build in small mindful moments: a quiet walk, a mindful bite of food, or a minute of deep breathing. Emotion Regulation: Prioritize sleep, hydration, and movement, your body influences your emotions more than you think. Practice Opposite Action when difficult feelings arise, do the opposite of how you feel. Add small, pleasant activities to your day to help balance stress. Distress Tolerance: If emotions rise, use the TIPP skills: temperature change, intense exercise, paced breathing, paired muscle relaxation. Keep a coping plan in mind for challenging situations: step outside, listen to music, call a friend. Try Grounding skills like the 5-4-3-2-1 sensory scan: notice 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, and 1 you taste to bring yourself back to the present. Interpersonal Effectiveness: Set gentle and clear boundaries around your time and energy. Use the FAST skill to support self-respect in communication: be fair, don’t apologize unnecessarily, stick to your values, and be truthful. Give yourself permission to say “no” when needed, and “yes” to things that support your well-being. Gratitude: Consider naming 3 small things you appreciate each day. Gratitude can be simple: a warm drink, a good laugh, or a moment of peace. Gratitude helps shift the brain toward what’s grounding, steady, and nourishing. The holidays can be wonderful and they can also be hard. Please remember that you’re not alone, and you have skills to support yourself through whatever arises. Wishing you moments of calm, connection, and care this season. Your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Crisis Text Line is available free, confidential, and 24/7. Text Got5 to 741741 to connect with a Crisis Counselor.